The Red Sox missed out on every big free agent this summer. So I guess David Ortiz has to start recruiting young Manny Ramirez look-a-likes.

BTW – Whoever represents Andy Petite needs to be fired. You turn down $10 million to sign for $5.5?!?! I freaking hate the Yankees.

Tony Romo said he wanted Jessica Simpson to gain a couple of pounds, but this might have been too much. The once hot blonde bombshell showed up to the 99.9 Kiss Country Chili Cookoff at C.B. Smith Park in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida looking much different from the days of the Dukes of Hazzard movie. Goodbye hot pants; hello high waisted jeans.

Then again, who am I to judge as I am scarfing down a pint of Hagen Daz at 10AM.

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Josh Smith demolished Steve Nash with this one handed tomahawk dunk. Poor guy didn’t know what was coming. At least Phoenix won the game to get closer to that 8th seed in the West.

I wish J Smooth would enter the slam dunk competition again. In fact how good would a Dwight Howard and Josh Smith throwdown be. As long as Nate Robinson isn’t incolved I would be fine with anyone else.

Will Carrie Stroup be the next Super Bowl media day darling? [FanIQ]

There is no doubt Luke Harangody is one of the best players in the nation and the effort he puts in is second to none. But that effort sometimes leaves him on the wrong side of some highlights. Just ask Earl Clark and Justin Mason.

Last night Harangody’s hustle led to another dunk. This time by UCONN’s Gavin Edwards as the Huskies end the longest home winning streak in the nation. Again, you can’t knock Luke’s effort as he was the reason the Irish were remotely close in that game. But sometimes things like this happen in sports. You aren’t always rewarded for your hard work.

SCP welcomes our newest writer, Tommy Neumann. Tommy brings a socially focused approach to much of his writing. Sometimes it’s funny as hell and other times it might be fit for The New Yorker. His first post comes just in time for the Super Bowl. Enjoy.

While the United States is currently engaged in what the noted historian Charles A Beard appropriately called  “Perpetual war for perpetual peace,” football has become the most popular sport in the country. Since the 1990s, football has surpassed baseball as a spectator sport — and its championship game, the Super Bowl, is watched by half of all homes who own a television. The ratings for the NFL playoffs double that of the World Series and triple those of the NBA Finals.

Post World War II, the American Federation of Scientists have listed nearly two hundred military incursions where our country is the aggressor. As our armed forces attack and invade nations in the name of democracy, tens of millions of people gather around their flat screen televisions to watch grown men play in the dirt. Continue Reading

Bosnians and Serbs clashed on Friday at the Australian open as Novak Djokovic, from Serbia, whooped Amer Delic, from Bosnia. Chairs were thrown, an innocent woman was hurt, and fights broke out in the streets after the match.

Unfortunately, this ethnic fighting is completely misdirected. Our favorite tennis star, Ana Ivanovic from Serbia, lost her match to Alisa Kleybanova from Russia. Shouldn’t the Serbians be fighting the Russians instead? They’re responsible for our sweetheart’s early exit.

Newsworthy photos of Ana Ivanovic after the jump, including a visual comparison to Kleybanova, who just beat her… Continue Reading

I hate to kick people when they seem to be down, but this guy really needs to sack up. There is no need to cry in public when your team loses. Do that in the privacy of your own home.

You also might want to look into getting new friends. I don’t think you need someone berating you, calling you a pu$$y, and egging you on in your state.

And no the NY Giants are not better than the Steelers. At least not without Plaxico Burress.

Abby wanted me to tell you all to have a wonderful weekend.

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It absolutely kills me to say this, but there seems to be a member of the Boston Red Sox who actually has some class. Obviously, he’s new to the team. [TampaBay.com]