From One Trainwreck to Another

Justin October 26, 2008 0

The 49ers have apparently done the impossible. According to the NFL network, they’ve set their sights on a potential team president who currently works at one of the few organizations in the world in worse shape than they are: The Bush Administration.

The team believes Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice would make a great team president and would help them secure financing for a new Stadium.  Before you laugh it off, consider these factors.


1. Before she joined the Administration, Rice ran Stanford, so she’s comfortable with the Bay Area.

2. She has often said her dream job would be NFL Commissioner. While this is terrifying revelation to hear from the woman who’s responsible for all US diplomacy worldwide, its not a bad goal for someone taking the top job in the front office of a professional football organization.

3. Rice built her reputation in International Relations as a Russia expert during the cold war. She’s shown a startling lack of ability to adjust to the new balance of power in the world since the iron curtain fell, but on the bright side, she’s perpetually stuck in a time when the Niners were the dominant force in the NFL. Just be gentle when you break the news that Joe Montana got traded.

(A note: I am aware that I could have gone for cheap Jerry RIce/Condoleeza Rice jokes in this space. But, I have too much respect for you, the reader, to reach for such obvious humor).

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