Here we go with another installation in the wildly popular series where I tell you things that I like, and then you read those things. It’s a system that has worked wonderfully up to now, and I trust will continue working.
I stole the idea from Mcsweeney’s. They do a better job.
1. The Wildcat offense:Â That’s what the Dophins have been running this season. It’s lots of direct snaps to Ronnie Brown. I can’t figure out why it’s working. It looks like it should be easy to solve. If you see Brown line up behind center and Chad Pennington isn’t close by, expect the run. Yet, somehow, Brown is running roughshod over good teams like the Pats and Chargers. Who knew Tony Sporano would be known for anything more than stupid puns from out of touch football writers trying to make pop cul
(Did you see what I did there? I ended it suddenly, just like the Sopranos ended. I mocked a literary tool while employing it. VeryÂ postmodern.)
2. Candace Parker:Â I’ve mentioned her before, but this week she won bothÂ Rookie of the Year and MVP.Â Add that to an Olympic Gold Medal, and the fact that she’sÂ the obvious heir apparent to teammate Lisa Leslie as the face ofÂ Women’sÂ hoops.Â Candace Parker’s not a great female basketball player. She’s a great basketball player who happens to beÂ female. And yes, there is a huge difference.
3. Jason Segal: After watching the first three episodes of How I Met Your Mother this season, I’m afraid to say it’s starting to lose its spark. They’ve turned Ted into a hopeless romantic who every week discovers something new that he doesn’t like about his girlfriend, then changes his mind and likes it by the end of the episode. Barney has also become a bit of an annoying cliche. And yet, there’s Marshall. Still freaking hilarious. Last week, he delivered an amazing monologue about the world’s greatest hamburger. This week, it was an amazing speech about the benefits of New Jersey over New York. (The idea of being too physically large for tiny New York bodegas hit especially close to home.)Â He’s the onlyÂ oneÂ that has stayed true to the essence of his character on that show.
Also, Forgetting Sarah Marshall. He wrote it. And starred in it. And it was pretty funny. Not one of the funniest movies I’ve ever seen, which is what RIchard Roeper called it, but still.. pretty good. I liked it.Â My only complaint is that, like other Judd Apatow produced movies, for two hours I was convinced an average fellow like myself would have a shot with a hot girl. Clearly, I do not. I will not. Stop giving me hope Judd Apatow and friends. It just makes the shock back to reality that much more harsh.
Also, he showed his weiner a lot in that movie. Give him credit for that. If there is such a thing as Dong Pride, he has it in spades.