Lots of Losers

California Correspondent May 8, 2008 2

We watched Wednesday night TV while you went out drinking. Here’s a recap of who lost big:

Chien Ming Wang took the mound and took an L for the Yankees last night, as Cleveland sqeaked by NY 3-0. I’m banning our writer Gino Vaginelli for jinxing the game by professing his love of Wang yesterday. To Wang’s credit, he did throw 7 innings and would have won if the Yanks didn’t leave 7 on base with 4 in scoring position.

Jonathan Papelbon took the L for Boston, as Lugo’s 9th inning fielding error put Detroit’s SS Edgar Renteria on base. Placido Flamingo Polanco followed up with a base hit to score Renteria, as Detroit’s pwned Boston 10-9.

Jason Castro, who desecrated Bob Dylan and Bob Marley with his American Idol performances on Tuesday, was finally voted off. Say adios to our blue-eyed dreadknotted hippy and stop pretending you didn’t watch last night.


Barry Zito made his return start for the San Francisco Giants, losing the game as expected. Zito threw for 5 innings, giving up 5 hits, 2 runs and 2 walks as the Giants lost to the Pirates 3-1. Zito fell to an 0-7 record, as the Giants offense failed to back up their top-paid losing pitcher. I’m bringing back the SportsCracklePop-o-Meter for Zito and awarding him minus 5 points, not only because he went to 0-7, but also because the Giants will never give him the run support he needs to get a W.

And if you didn’t think it could get worse than Zito’s, Papelbon’s and Wang’s performances, Brad Penny just proved you wrong. Penny gave up 10 runs in 4.2 innings, as the Mets just clobbered the Dodgers 12-1. Even Mets pitcher John Maine, who has a .067 batting average, hit Penny with a 2 run base-hit. Speaking of Maine, he also took a shutout into the 9th Wednesday, and was 2 outs away from his 3rd shutout and complete game when Matt Kemp ruined it with a 1 run single.


  1. Smokestack May 8, 2008 at 1:54 pm -

    castro is a fucking moron– so thrilled that hes off the show, cant wait until they get to go to their hometowns next week!

  2. King Ing May 8, 2008 at 2:29 pm -

    Bring back Haley Scarnato

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